Personal Inventory

Author - Jauhmar Ellick McAllister

I really have nothing much to say to this, but the question posed was, "How have you seen yourself grow while being here?" I can definitely say that's a loaded question because how have I grown? I haven't. I haven't grown in the way you think I'm growing. Whether it's spiritually, emotionally, mentally, or even psychologically, I haven't grown in any of those areas. Not once have I actually had to take an inventory of myself, and when I have, I'm always empty. But then again, I would be lying if I didn't say I've grown in my relationship with God. Cause I definitely have. Since coming to this program, my understanding of what it means to have alone time with the Lord has increased tremendously. Having a space to quiet down your thoughts and mind after a busy day can be so helpful at times. But it can also be so worrisome. Now, I'm not the one to tell you that it will work for you, but it works for me.

We have this thing called "Selah Time," which is after we are done reading scripture for the day, we go back and meditate on His word. And I can say it has been helping. One instance is when I had to confess my sins to my mentors and peers. I usually would run away from that in the past, but God gave me the strength to do so. It was a challenge. I hated it because I didn't know what would happen. My mind was put at ease when He led me to ol' faithful. Psalms 23!

We all know that verse like it's the back of our hand, but this time, it hit a little differently. God told me that He's all I need and to relax because He leads me besides peaceful streams. It's amazing how God can work in our circumstances, even when things seem bleak. Where things seem like they are dead in the water, and you have no hope. But I challenge that: be like Peter and have faith to step out on the water in the midst of your storm. But don't take your eye off Jesus, or you'll sink. Yes, it's definitely easier said than done, but IT CAN BE DONE. I'm tired of people using this excuse, "Oh, welp, I'm human." Man, hush that puppy up. It's old, it's an excuse. It's a cop-out to continue to do what you know you're not supposed to do. You have the power of the Almighty God living inside of you. What's your excuse? What's your excuse for living the way you live, for continuing to stay in sin and then calling yourself a Christian? Man, stand up for something or fall for anything! It all goes back to the garden, even before that, when Satan rebelled against God. He had everything. He was even made out of the most precious gemstones around. And yet he still couldn't get past himself and wanted to take away the glory the God had.

Too many of us (myself included) want to be like Jesus but don't want to put the work in. Because we're lazy, we don't have discipline. If you say you are alive in Christ, show it! Do it like Christ did. Go to the Father every day and twice on Sunday. Get to know Him like He knows you. We want to have time with everyone except the one who saved us.

This blog might be a little hard to read, so I apologize. But I want y'all to know I love you too much not to say something. MAKE TIME FOR GOD! Create space, whether it's in your car, your bathroom, your room, garage, or sofa, it doesn't matter. Open that space for Him and watch how different your life is. How different it is when you go through those storms. I promise you it will be worth it.

This is a shorter blog than usual, but it's because I didn't have much to say. But ask yourself this question: take an inventory check. "How have you grown since becoming a Christian?" "Since becoming a disciple?" Not just a believer, yes, being a believer is cool and whatnot, but how are you making an impact as a disciple of Jesus Christ? Are you building with gold, silver, and jewels? Or are you using wood, hay, and stubble? Judgment day is coming soon. It might even be around the corner. How will you be when your name is called, and you have to stand in front of Jesus Christ himself? Will your works burn up, or will they stand against the fire? YOU CHOOSE.

Promise of the Week

The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.
He makes me lie down in green pastures.
He leads beside still waters
He restores my soul.
He leads me in the path of righteousness for His name sake.
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil,
For you are with me;
Your rod and staff,
They comfort me.
You prepare a table before me
In the presence of my enemies;
You anoint my head with oil;
My cup overflows.
Surely goodness and mercy
Shall follow me
All the days of my life,
And I shall dwell in the house of the
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