Slowing Down

Author - Emma Stanley

I can’t say this hasn’t been an interesting or eventful week. Sydney and I had the opportunity to help my momma with the estate sale she and her partner had set up. It was quite fun to introduce Sydney to something that has become second nature to me. She was a huge help especially with me nursing an injured knee. It was interesting to invite someone from The Fellowship into such a different part of my life. Introducing Sydney to friends I would never have thought she would meet was a bit nerve-wracking for me. I was worried about what she’d think of me if it’d be awkward, or if she didn’t like how goofy I became when around these loved ones but I was realizing more and more just how much was left to show of myself and my life. It was great to have had the opportunity to see Sydney in a new environment and marry those aspects of my life together and be more genuine in showing the not-so-serious parts of me.

Speaking of intermingling aspects of my life; I was given the opportunity to serve at Strong Foundations in downtown San Antonio with my small group and man was that a treat. I’ve been in the process of getting screened by my church to work with our kids’ ministry and since I’m in the midst of that I haven’t been able to work with kids in a while. If you know me and my family you can understand how weird that has been for me. I grew up in kids ministry and as soon as I aged out I started to serve in the nursery of my old church. That allowed doors to open and allowed me to minister to foster families and get certified for respite care. Since before the summer, I hadn’t had the chance to work with any of my foster kids so the Lord giving me this time to minister to hurting families was a joy. On top of that, I got to do this with my new church family and share my love for these souls with them, I mean I could hardly keep the smile off my face all night!

I’ve been trying to spend more one-on-one time with each of my fellow teamers to build a more in-depth friendship with each of them This week I just so happened to be given the chance to go to Target with Cesar to accompany him on some errands. It was maybe the second time that we had gone together to do anything of this nature so I honestly didn’t know what to expect. Well, a quick trip to Target led to a trip to Walmart and then one more trip to H-E-B to try and find all that was on our lists, and man was it fun. We shared stories from different points of view, bonded over picking out really ugly fabrics, and ended the night starting a new show making tie blankets together out of cheetah print and camouflage material… I don’t quite know how we got there but it brightened a day I didn’t know needed any brightening until I saw how dull it would’ve been if not for the spur-of-the-moment decision to make the ugliest matching blankets we possibly could make.

Said ugly blankets will come in handy this weekend because to end off the week we are all headed down to my family’s ranch to hunt and relax in my favorite place on earth. A place where we get to admire creation and spend luxurious moments in silence during the early morning hunting and late night star gazing. I’m excited to see how this weekend will shape us as we spend every waking moment with each other in a much more relaxed environment.

So, I’ve learned lots of new things this week; how to use a table saw, how to drill in screws at just the right angle with the right pressure to secure boards together, and how to toe-nail. I’ve learned how hard I can be on myself and how discouraged I can grow over the smallest things like missing a nail head or not nailing the marinade for dinner. I’m learning how to step back and allow others to teach and how to admit that I can’t do it on my own. I’m learning how hard it can be to slow down and let my body rest especially when everyone around me is going at the same pace they’ve always gone just doing so without me. I’m learning how to stop and look at a conversation or situation from all angles before drawing conclusions. I’m learning how to ask questions about the conflict in Israel and how to pray in a way that intercedes on their behalf. I’m learning how to sit in the reality of the war that is impacting so many around me. I’m learning how to listen to the Spirit and let Him lead.

I’m learning how to live in a way that causes people to see God through me.